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Monday, 4 May 2015

May feels mighty

Swept with thinning clouds floating, almost fiercely, before this full moon. I am charged with a healthy focus beyond the night sky. My birthday dusted off a few friendships that were hiding behind busy lives.
That's what it's about. Not an expensive gift or luxurious meal. Just the simple connection of your loved ones making the special effort to let you know you are in their lives in some way. 
 I love the feeling of losing expectation from the ones you love. Too many times in the past I have wanted my partner to spoil me with love letters, gifts & flowers, wine n dines, day spas & home made everything. I knew I was far too focused on the ME WANT in these lead ups instead of the I HAVE through it all. For as long as I can remember - I've loved birthdays & people writing me cards, expressing their feelings & showing their talents. I loved limelight & knowing the attention was validated. I see now that I wanted validating. 
This year I had to make a change. I had to let go of the pressure I put on things .. (Believe it or not it's not just my birthday that I try & perfect) I had to just stand back & let my feelings give way so I could observe the actual impact of the right here right now.  
Oh What an Impact!
 How glorious to feel the world 'just as it is'. I have spent a lot of this year removing my rose coloured glasses on plenty of my life situations. Being a defence family calls for more than I knew. It's a constant juggle of boundaries and commitments. My Taurean nature is certainly steadfast and I love that grounding but testing my ability to stay connected to my 'fox' energy is a commitment in itself. 
May this month bring about more grounding connections for me & for all of you. What ever it may be that you need notice and change or reveal and amplify.  
I gifted myself a present this year too, my first Dharma Yoga Wheel http://www.dharmayogawheel.com/
and it's glorious. Painful but glorious. These kind of reminders that it's not just my thoracic spine in need of opening but my heart and most importantly my head! Each time I rolled over it I got up with pounding headaches & nausea. 
Typical me jumping in without sourcing the gentle growth. My head, thoughts, limits and anxieties were all slamming together in one big messy mix. 

Yoga gives us many things - like a mediative mind, some days a surprising stretch, other days the knowledge to step back. The focus to see it for what it really is. 
Our Asana practice gives us healing & balance. Energy & relaxation.  Awareness & sensitivity. Most bountiful though is the training of the mind to concentrate. To sustain a focused attention and create mental stamina. 

My head wasn't ready for the Dharma Wheel, my forcing it to hang for too long or even a little, was screaming out at me, my spine aching to curl knew better. It's a tasty message & one that I'm certainly listening to with more courage now. 

Yet not all messages are as bold (& painful) as my push to curl into beautiful back bends. 
Most days we cast aside feeling a little 'off', achey or disgruntled. It's nice to take a closer look. Take a step back to your breath and feel what 'exactly' is on your plate today. 
What is on offer - what can wait? Is there a smorgasbord of choices that please or ones that drain you?
Our body mind connection is one of the most fascinating of all time. For me anyway. Yoga practice, especially the kind off the mat, the everyday stuff of self realisation and compassion toward our world & all in it. 

If you haven't made a commitment to your practice yet, coming at it from an inquisitive state - daily - will help you to discover the real need at hand. You don't have to commit to a studio or a session everyday, you just need to start noticing your intention to do anything. Tomorrow you might feel physically slumped or mentally drained. That might be the key to a doorway in which you sit on the floor or lay in a spinal twist and just let yourself unravel instead of hitting the couch & switching on to external media. Perhaps you will find an interesting assessment of your own internal viewing. It's your perception, it's your experience. 
Even in the physical sense you can get a mighty fix of infinite impulses that you can sense, sit with and develop. A run around the streets or walk under the stars, give up your own knowledge of this experience and feel totality in it. 

I have only just begun my teaching here in Medowie. There are only a handful of open hearted and keen faces that grace my Saturday mornings. Unsure of where to host evening sessions I have recently decided to give Monday nights a go in a hall down at Williamtown. These sessions will begin in June. So keep an eye out on Facebook for dates to be revealed.  

If you read these blogs regularly you will remember my beautiful friend in Townsville gifting me my first Kombucha tea Scoby. 
I have adored the brewing process so much and would love to share the reaping with my yogi community. Next week I will bring some bottles of this organic goodness to sell at $8. If you bring your clean bottle back I will refill it for you for $6! 

Until next time remember to 
FORGIVE PEOPLE AND MOVE FORWARD.
Don't live your life with hate in your heart. You will end up hurting yourself more than the people you hate.  Forgiveness is not saying, "What you did to me is okay."  It is saying, "I'm not going to let what you did to me ruin my happiness forever."  Forgiveness is the remedy.  It doesn't mean you're erasing the past, or forgetting what happened.  It means you're letting go of the resentment and pain, and instead choosing to learn from the incident and move on with your life.  Remember, the less time you spend hating the people who hurt you, the more time you'll have to love the people who love you.


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